A new record…

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So, the Xmas music started today at work.

Congratulate me – I made it to 9:15 before making a face about the annoying music. (The song was “Hey Santa” by the Wilson Sisters).

Only 19 days to go!

In other news, yes, I *DID* sing along to Darlene Love’s “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)” when that came on. I’m not a total grinch 🙂


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Thank heavens for Facebook. And for a husband who is far, far better at empathy than his wife. (And wasn’t mad when we overslept this morning, whoops).

Gene’s birthday

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So, Gene’s birthday was Monday. I won’t tell you how old he is because then he’d look like a major cradle robber, being married to a 29 year old. I will just tell you he was born during Woodstock. Except not at Woodstock.

(:::Pauses to consider Blanche at Woodstock:::  )

(Ha ha ha).

Anyway, I took the day off of work. I spent the morning at the Nissan dealership (oil change! filter change! something or other cleaning! $200 and change! Whee!) and of course at Dr. P’s office (see separate ranting post). (Except I left out the part where my appointment was for 10:45 and I didn’t even get out of the Waiting Room of Doom until 11:30).

And then Gene and I went shooting. He’s a membership of a local wildlife association (don’t worry, we didn’t shoot anything but targets, and believe me, the targets got the worst of it). I shot big guns and I did pretty well. I don’t like guns, but I do think that when I have shot them it gives me a respect for what they can do. And I know one thing: I do not want to get shot. Holy cow that must hurt. It’s hard enough pulling the friggin’ trigger.

And, I made a birthday cake for Gene that we started eating on Saturday. It was this cake and it was delightful. I made it from scratch. Yes, really. The recipe calls for cake flour, but I couldn’t find any. I should probably have looked longer, but the cake was still good. (Oh, and while I was baking the cake, Gene bought me a bouquet of flowers. Yay!)

bad sign…

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I just had to hunt through 4 different “Favorites” menus in Safari (my web browser of choice) before I could find my link to post in my own blog.

In better news, the Great Black and Brown Hunter (a/k/a Betty) killed a rabbit today. And left it behind my chair. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Fortunately, Gene handled disposal. Eek.

And in TRULY better news: Gene got a phone call yesterday from a lady reporting that she had our dogs – black and brown dogs – and that one of them was badly injured. The dogs had tags from the suburb’s police department. They had the same personalized collars (with names and phone #s) that Betty & Scooby have. (That is, the collars had OUR phone #s on them, just different dog names).

“M’am,” Gene says, “I can see my dogs right here.”
How did these impostor dogs get collars with our phone # on them? Weird! I hope the injured dog is safe, but I am enough of an asshole to admit that I am glad the dogs were not ours. When I got home (the lady called 3 minutes before I leave work), Gene was lying in the dog bed, holding both dogs like his life depended on it. (Awwwwwwwww).

7 years…

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So, seven years ago today Gene and I got married. Just about everyone who reads this blog was there and like I said on Facebook, I am so thankful that everyone I love in the world was there. I have the pictures to prove it 🙂 This time 7 years ago, Gene and I sat at our dining room table alone, ate leftovers from the buffet (I hated our caterer but I was so glad that there was food in the house!) and opened our presents. We had a zillion hour drive to WDW the next day and I wrote Thank you notes on the way.

That entire weekend was really nice. Gene’s brother and his wife showed up on Thursday (?), my friend Tracy showed up that day too – we went to the mall and spent a lot of money at the Clinique counter in hopes that I’d learn how to do my makeup via osmosis. (I think I forced Tracy to eat barbeque for lunch… what a sport!)

Later on Thursday we had a huge crowd at the house and grilled steak. My SIL made blue cheese stuffed zucchini and oh, that was yummy. Admittedly it’s fuzzy now – I’m going to guess that Friday was my bachelorette party (and Gene’s bachelor party – hey, Brandy, remember Gene’s brother trying to run us off the road in a rental minivan?). By then Brandy and Julie and Amanda had showed up. Awesome. All the women (except my stepgrandmother and a few others – maybe my Aunt Lyn?) went out for Mexican food and then the younger crew went to Dave & Busters. We danced a little, we drank a little, we played a little pool. The only rule was that I did not want anything waggling in my face. Impressively, no one tried me on that one.

Saturday: rehearsal, rehearsal dinner at a Creole restaurant. The rehearsal dinner was financed by my family, which is good because if we’d had to buy you all would have been lucky to get two slices of pizza. (A word on the wedding budget: you start off a year before the wedding buying the cheapest shoes possible and the day before the wedding you basically walk around with your Visa in your hand, just offering anyone money to just…make…problems…go…away! To wit, see above re: Clinique counter).

Anyway. Sunday, the big day. Awesome. Brandy gave a reading and I didn’t promise to obey anyone. (The minister wouldn’t have let it happen anyway).

Oh, hey, the minster! He walked into the dressing room where Gene was waiting (nervously…) and told him that I’d told him that Gene was going to recite his vows from memory. (This is funny because I pieced together the entire ceremony and I’m pretty sure Gene had only memorized “I do” and may have not even read it)

Hee!!  The minister = expensive, but worth it. (Especially since our other options were getting married in prison or at City Hall, neither of which was a valid choice for multiple reasons).

And in conclusion, I married Gene seven years ago today. It was a good day and I’m glad we’re married. And gladder yet that we will never have to do that again.

‘ears the thing…

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Because I know you are all waiting with baited breath for an update on Elaine’s Ears, here it is!

Now ‘righty’ is pissed off at all the attention ‘lefty’ has received and has chosen to take it out on me.  Owwwwwww. (Righty, don’t have a tantrum. Use your words!) I emailed D at work today and asked if she had any good drugs because I’d like to be pain free when I use my letter opener to perform an emergency eardrum-ectomy. (She very kindly offered me her last Advil instead, which I took her up on).

Big weekend…

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So, we went to a chili cookoff but didn’t eat chili and spent 3 hours Saturday waiting for the cops (which is why we didn’t get to eat chili).

(And how was YOUR weekend?)

Anyway. So, we dropped the dogs off and headed out of town to go to a chili cookoff in a small town a few counties away. After awhile on the highway, we decide to take country roads to our destination. After awhile on the country roads, we decide that since we are headed that direction anyway, we should stop off and say hello to Blanche.

Except, remember the last time we tried this and got so lost we ended up in a neighboring state? Yeah. Thanks to Hertz NeverLost, we had good directions to the funeral home but we couldn’t remember the name of the church she’s buried in (so sue me – it was something or other Baptist church and you can’t throw a beanbag without hitting a half dozen Baptist churches down here).

Eventually, we find it. We check out her gravestone, leave some flowers, and proceed to take off, possibly to try and find Gene’s late father’s burial site (which we knew was in a VA cemetery about 20 minutes away, although we would have been lost once we got there!). Oh, and by this time it is 11:30 or so and I haven’t eaten a thing all day. I am famished. And thirsty.

So, we start to drive down this little two lane road (is it a two lane road when there is one lane for each direction?) and I look over and see…uhoh. A stray dog. Remember Awesome-O? Awesome-O II? Awesome-O III? Well, we had us (hee) another Awesome-O. She was friendly. She had a decrepit collar on but no tags. She came right up to us and was IN the car about 20 seconds later. 

So, the city we’re in? Is one of the 10 poorest in the entire United States (CNN tells me so). There are no rescue groups and the one and only vet’s office that was open scanned the dog and said she wasn’t chipped so they couldn’t try and find her owners. “But hey, you may have found yourself a new dog!”

(Umm, NO).

So eventually we get the city cops involved…who call the county sherriff’s office involved (because the dog was found outside city limits, it’s a county issue)…who finally get animal control to show up. And that lady put that cute little dog in the back of her truck (the kind with crates, like you see on Animal Cops) and thanked us and drove off. And I’m pretty sure that Awesome-O IV went to live on a farm for the rest of her days. 

(It’s 3 PM by this point)

We wandered through the chili cookoff area, which had devolved into a few carts selling drinks, candy apples, etc but the chili was gone 🙁 On the bright side, we got to the hotel (which is why we could not have kept A-IV), got the grime off of us, relaxed, watched a little TV, went to a really good dinner and then watched a little more TV.

And now we’re home and back to regular life. So regular, in fact, that I am going to go fold laundry. The joy of grownup life.

PS: I am including this under the “Sweet Things My Husband Has Done” tag because, even though he’s beating himself up for wasting the early afternoon trying to get a dog (who we may or may not have accidentally stolen, per the cops) someplace safe, it was still done with a good heart. If it had been Betty or Scooby, they would have been lucky to find a stranger like him.

Spoiled rotten…

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So, Gene did many sweet things yesterday!

1) He cleaned the guest bathroom! (Since we let the cleaning lady go, the guest bathroom is categorized as His Problem. Perhaps you think that the rest of the house being Largely My Problem makes it out of balance, but I think that this means there is one less toilet to clean and I am FINE with that).

2) He cleaned up the kitchen after last night’s very complicated dinner (I mean, a pasta pot AND a skillet? I know that *I* wouldn’t have wanted to clean all that – really).

3) He took a cabinet door off its hinges so we could go order a replacement from Lowes Home Improvement and then! He actually went to Lowes to order it. (Seriously – if it had been a Me Problem, the door would have stayed propped on the stairs for months). And! When it comes in he’s going to install it! With his bare hands! Color me impressed, especially if one of those bare hands is holding a screwdriver.

4) And then! We went to Chik-Fil-A for milkshakes. And he paid. Yea! (That may sound stupid, but we are budgeted only so much fun money a month, and I’d spent a bit of mine buying him milkshakes so this evens us out).

5) And this week! He is going out of town Wednesday night (big concert in Washington DC) so you know what that means! Taco Bell! Yeehaw. (Or maybe frozen food, but let’s assume Taco Bell).

And in other news…

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1) Gene got me flowers for Valentine’s Day. They’re tulips and are so pretty. Yea!
2) So I ordered a new purse to replace my almost 10 year old brown Coach handbag. I like it so far but it is HUGE. I can fit an entire library book in it. Maybe this will encourage me to carry more stuff. I’m pretty basic – just my wallet and a zillion random receipts, some of which I have written important stuff on (fictional restaurant names, etc). I bought the new purse on ebags.com so I couldn’t really get a feel for how large it is. My worst fear is that I have accidentally purchased a “Mom” purse (which is a purse identical to my Mom’s purse or that of any of my aunts or grandmothers). Hopefully the purse’s butterfly hang tag (don’t ask) gives it a youthful edge. I’m too young for a mom purse.

25 Things, a crosspost from Facebook

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1) I blog at laineyd.com. (I know, Duhhh right?)
2) I just found a problem with around 900 of my employer’s W-2s for 2008. I hope my boss remembers this the next time I forget to do something minor. (I talk about W-2s a lot this time of year, it’s just a weird thing about me)
3) I don’t always like my job – okay, I almost never like my job – but I am inexplicably committed to it.
4) When my husband is out of town I spend a lot of time on Pogo.com.
5) Okay, I do that when he’s in town too.
6) I also try to spend time reading and writing.
7) I finished The Time Travelers Wife earlier this week and cried like a baby.
8) When I was on vacation in Kuala Lumpur, I read 6 books. It was like a dream.
9) I have a degree in journalism but I have never, ever used it.
10) July will mark the 10th anniversary of graduating from college.
11) January marks the 8th anniversary of being a payroll clerk.
12) The above two facts are just sad.
13) I don’t have any children, but I have a stepson and two dogs. My husband says I can have three dogs and no babies or two dogs and one baby.
13A) It’s probably time to just get a third dog
13B) If for some reason we had triplets, would I have to get rid of the dogs?
14) I miss Indiana. I like where I live now and I love our house and our life, but I do miss Indiana.
15) I wish I’d stuck to my guns and voted for Stephen Colbert in November. Obama still won even without my vote. Heck, I don’t think my state ever officially was “called” either way.
16) 2009 feels a little bit like 1993 (the year Bill Clinton was sworn in as POTUS), but not quite as “It’s a wonderful whole new world!” as it was then. Then again, I was a teenager in 1993 and now I’m an adult. Makes sense I’d see things differently.
17) As I said above, I love living here (a large city in the Southeastern region of the US) but I hate it when people suggest everyone here is a hick. Southerners aren’t stupid.
18) For cryin’ out loud, they invented sweetened ice tea. How dumb could they be?
19) I lie about my age, but I do it humorously. I change my age frequently. It’s gotten to the point where even my own dad doesn’t know my real age. (31 going on 32)
20) My little brother just turned 29, so I am going to start telling people that we are fraternal twins.
21) I don’t know if my dad will buy that, though.
22) I love to do math in my head. I can’t sum big numbers but I do pretty well.
23) My high school senior prom was the only school dance I went to in high school.
24) I don’t know if I’ll ever have a kid, but if I do, I’d want her to grow up just like me.
25) Or else become a cheerleader. For real.