{"id":1128,"date":"2008-08-09T16:35:09","date_gmt":"2008-08-09T23:35:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/laineyd.com\/?p=1128"},"modified":"2008-08-09T16:35:09","modified_gmt":"2008-08-09T23:35:09","slug":"wishes","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/laineyd.com\/?p=1128","title":{"rendered":"Wishes"},"content":{"rendered":"

I wish that I could meet Stephen Colbert. I would like to get a picture taken with him where I’m pointing at him with a crazed look on my face – a version of this one<\/a>. I could totally be his New Atheist Friend.<\/p>\n

I wish that I had remembered to watch the opening games of the Olympics. I have no idea why. Now I’m trying to watch the rerun on the Mandarin Chinese channel that is devoted to the Olympics, but it’s in freaking CHINESE. (Problem solved – thank you NBC.com!)<\/p>\n

I wish that (ooh, TMI alert) that my fucking Aunt would show up or just stay the fuck away for a year or more. (Truthfully, I think she’ll be here soon – what are the odds, really?).<\/p>\n

I wish that – speaking of Aunts, this time non-theoretical – that my Aunt will get better quickly. She is expected to do well (get your mammograms!) but still. I may not see her often but I am certainly fond of my mother and father’s sisters.<\/p>\n

I wish that I had more money in my PayPal account.<\/p>\n

I wish – scarily – that I could spend tomorrow at work. I haven’t touched my mailbox, checked a Social Security Number, responded to requests for paystubs, done a background check or filled out paperwork for Baby Daddies to get bitchslapped by our insurance in at least a week. One of the location managers asked me if I had an assistant to do all the little things (like enter 2500 lines of payroll by fucking hand) and I nearly laughed her out of the state. If it is to be, it’s up to me. (Not entirely true: I would be floating in Lake Cheesecake now if Gwen hadn’t been a HUGE help. Stefania’s Toady was also a help, but I have already paid her off in frosty drinks from Sonic).<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I wish that I could meet Stephen Colbert. I would like to get a picture taken with him where I’m pointing at him with a crazed look on my face – a version of this one. I could totally be his New Atheist Friend. I wish that I had remembered to watch the opening games…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[12,20,21],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1128","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-baby-dreaming","category-life-in-cheesecake-city","category-mahjobiscrappis"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/laineyd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1128","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/laineyd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/laineyd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/laineyd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/laineyd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1128"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/laineyd.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1128\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/laineyd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1128"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/laineyd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1128"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/laineyd.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1128"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}