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Optimus Prime, the Movie Star…

Posted on May 22, 2005 by laineyd

Because I clearly don’t have anything interesting to say, I’m instead going to post about movies that I always have to sit and watch whenever they come on TV:

1) Working Girl – Harrison Ford. Mmmm. Plus, I can’t say “bony ass” anymore without thinking of Melanie Griffith’s tell-off to Sigourney Weaver. And…I still like to say “And it’s not even leather!” when I see an expensive outfit. (Actually, the last time I said it was when Gene ordered his new office chair).
2) The Big Chill – Come on…You Can’t Always Get What you Want on the organ? Kevin Kline’s now you see it now you don’t Southern accent? Glenn Close letting her husband fuck her baby rabid best friend? Good times.
3) Love, Actually – This was on TV just last night and I timed it perrrrfectly. Just the last 20 or so minutes so we can see the Colin Firth proposes in Portugese scene. I also cried like a little girl with a dead puppy over the people hugging at the airport scene at the end. Wahh. One of these days I need to watch the whole film again. I haven’t actually seen the entire movie since the time I rented it on Colin Firth Night when Gene was out of town.
4) Office Space – A couple of years ago I was actually required to wear flare at work (now note, please, that I work in the office and do not actually see any paying restaurant guests). Plus, I feel for poor ol’ Milton.

The thing about these movies is, I don’t want to actually own them on DVD. I have a lot of DVDs that I still haven’t watched (Godfather Trilogy, Gone With the Wind, Season 4 of South Park). If I owned any of these movies, I wouldn’t watch them, but I’d still sit down while folding laundry or something to watch them if they came on Starz or TBS or something. Yes, I’m a weirdo.

(Crazy ranting starts here…I think it’s funny but maybe you had to be there?)
In other news…and I can’t believe I failed to mention this in yesterday’s yammering post…after lunch, we drove to the open air mall across the street from our subdivision to go see that crappy Christian Slater movie. We spent some of that time drinking wine at the wine bar next door and the rest of it plotting a chick flick hybrid movie. We waited inside the theater next to a poster for a movie called The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants, so Gene was intrigued. Here are the notes I took – watch for this on the next season of Project Greenlight:

Title, “How the Steel Beach Tomato Ya-Yas Got their Groove Back”

I think it’s time for a chick flick hybrid, don’t you?

The movie will star: Optimus Prime (of the Transformers), Gwyneth Paltrow as the Mom, Jessica Alba (because we know she’s not busy – she’s a brunette so she can play the Barbara Hershey/Whoopi Goldberg/Mary-Louise Parker character who coughs at the start so you know she’s a goner), Phoebe from Friends (as the ditsy one) and Uma Thurman (as the slutty one). Soundtrack to include Barbra Streisand songs and that Milkshake song that Gene likes. No reason for inclusion, he just likes it. At least it wasn’t that “I like big butts” song that he sings sometimes and has taught the boy.

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